So now we understand why the drink is this color….!

For summer vacation this year we rented a condo in a private beach community on the southern end of Curacao, with snorkeling gear, a full kitchen, and our own little lagoon. When we swam underwater we heard dolphins singing from the marina next door, and when we needed some afternoon energy, it was an easy walk to Mambo beach for french fries drenched in onions and peanut sauce. Mike made dinner on our charcoal grill, and we sat outside, listening to the birds and the palms trees clacking in the wind. This is an odd thing to say, I know, but the hot, balmy air and the clattering palm trees reminded me so much of Mozambique.

There were so many things about this week that I loved, but I think what I love most is that being together as a family really felt easy and fun. As the boys get older and I’m unsure of the role I play in their lives, I think deep inside what I want to feel is that my presence is comfortable, and that being a family, even when there’s somewhere else they might rather be, is nice enough to still be one, sometimes.

We had a fantastic week, swimming with sea turtles, playing games on the patio, listening to thunderstorms, watching James Bond movies, eating pizza, tasting real Blue Curacao, taking a weird taxi ride, cooking noodles, sleeping late, snorkeling with fish, swimming in the pool, walking around Willemstad, riding the bus, sipping sunset cocktails, listening to birds in the morning, and taking a death-defying ride on a jet ski past oil tankers on the open ocean. Mike and I had some really great drivers for that, and thank goodness the sunglasses survived!

I keep thinking the strand of pearls that is my life with my kids is slipping… like each year that passes, is one more slipped away. Could it be, that the string of pearls is still getting longer? Probably. Being wrong about the future is the only thing I’ve consistently done, my entire life.

I know the kids don’t like me posting pictures, but the truth is, nobody is reading this, so the pictures are here for me. The truth is I’m not usually present anymore in their life-changing moments, and the things that matter in their lives exist in a realm where I don’t. Now I’m just Mom, and Mom takes pictures. So there.

The branches of the tree grow far from the center, strong and reaching for the sunlight. Just remember, my sweet ones, that the center is still here. And it will be here, always.